Labour Day's Eve

tomorrow's public holiday. yippee.
playday @ batam. may i stand this time. ^-^

decisions made and more to be made. need to sit down and talk.
sort things out. the show will go on. life goes on.
just that i will have more time with the northwest winds soon. :P

time really flies. humans are silly things. or i am really a silly thing.

lala.

furry family members...

The diva bitch, still in the process of recovering from the shock of having to share her space and food with newbie.

The bitch being comforted by the bigger bitch. ^_^

Big brother blurring out as usual, note that newbie Lai Lai's at the background begging for food, despite a hefty breakfast...

The buzzing newbie, finally still enough to have picture taken. He is here to stay!! Really small in comparison right? heeheehee... still can't get all three together for a pic though. :P

@ T-junction

Thank you for not beating around the bush. I feel much at ease now.

I choose to look at it in a positive way, 6th july will prob be the day.
It's good as I can go in peace.

Not wise.

I can be blatant at times. Too blunt.

肠子太直，性子太急。

皮肉之累不比心灵之倦。

Saying no is not easy, and people fear the perception of others, that one is anti-social, is a spoilt-sport, is not a team-player if they say no. So despite the situation or how they personally feel they oblige, and then air their grouses to others. I guess this is what they call tact, something that eludes me for most of my life.

I guess that is why I can appear cold and aloof at times. For situations that I don't like I pull out either in action or speech. Ok, I am not 'there yet' in that I will openly say no for all occasions, I will usually evade and not participate or do. So far other arrangements can be made. I won't go with the flow if I can help it. No point me smiling and bearing it and then complain it to others who can't do much about the situation. That is one skill I never am able to do. For me if I don't like I won't do. Yah, not wise, and its a luxury to some extent. T_T


What will people think of me? Cold, aloof, moody, anti-social? I don't know, and to a large extend, I don't care. Not wise in the career sense of the word. Add that to being too frank... Power... won't go too far anywhere.

Now in emo mode, am in a like I care mode. Nah, won't cut myself with a penknife or something, it is so juvenile, though I am figuratively slashing myself in terms of putting up and keeping a good image. Heh. Am still very much a teenager at heart, having commitment probs and lacking the desire to please people.

Little moments in the printing room.

Pre exams printing frenzy. As usual I was on the verge of tearing down the whole room as the collator keeps jamming up on me. A tiny little voice begging to be heard at the back of my head finally got its message through just before I unleased mayhem. I unloaded the papers, neaten them up a little more than what I usually would and placed them back to the collator. And the collator collate happily ever after, smoothly.


Yes, it's a same old story, change your attitude and perspective and realise that things are actually not as bad; it is usually our own fault due to our personality. Hehee... same old story, yet a lesson that most of us just don't get it for most of the time...

Little moments in the classroom.

Don't know to laugh or to cry.
Teaching a class halfway a female student suddenly blurt out, "cher, you have figure!"
(Choked... and I was in my working shirt and pants... )

"Oi, you should be focusing on your revision, not me."

"Aiyah, but that is more fun mah..." (Huh??? Omg...) Feigned horror and moved away...

Dots...

They will notice when you change your socks, watches, earstuds, accessories etc. But they will not remember that crucial point that is blatantly printed in bold in the textbook. Kids. -.-.

Munday Bloo

Managed to drag myself to school... and now it is halfway through. Heeeh... am amazed, though functioning capacity is less than half. Haiz, so much about the mantra of either do a good job or not do it at all. As me drifts by... O.o

T_T will probably be skipping my aikido lessons again, a second set of 4-5 skips in a row. But things happen...

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Mum picked up an abandoned shih tzu, and therefore we now have 3 doggies in the house!! Haahaa the residental bitch wasn't very happy at all, the newbie, that my parents fondly call Lai Lai, (he came, they said -.-) is like 1/4 the size of the old ones. -.- Newbie's hyper, the bitch is in her moods, the dog in autstic mode, so can't get a good picture of all three of them. Haahaahaa...

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For some reasons grandparents of friends and friends' friends have moved on to a better place at this period of time. With such closures of a certain chapters of life, we tend to pause and think of the inevitable. All my grandparents have gone, so well, guess who are next in line. I shudder to think of the inevitable and wonder how I will react when the time comes. Being the big baby that I am who doesn't admit that I am a big baby who relies still heavily on my parents for support, I think it is time that I begin not to go with the flow and take up some more responsibilities?

Time is ticking by, it really is ticking... wonder what it will be like when it is eventually, my turn?

Slacker's dilemma.

Life's a double-edged sword. Your blessings can be your bane too... The sea has such restorative powers while the sun saps it. Darn it, why am I not feeling ill enough to warrant an MC? Am so tired! Am not prepared for school. Hehee... slacker me...

Weekend races that have become some sort of a routine. Heh, am happy and sad at the same time that this is one of the last ones for some time to come. As usual me butt itchy, go help out officiating, now... I suffer the effects. ZZzzzZZZzzzZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz...

But it was cool, the weather system was really screwed. For one race the flags on the race comm and pin end boats just some 50-75m apart were flying in opposite directions. So some of the sailboats literally run towards the upwind mark while others have to beat up, and got pushed back by the currents. Huh?!?!! Fantastic. Talk about luck and irony. Hahaa of course that race was abandoned but we had a fun time wondering at the situation.

Oh yah, it's EARTH DAY today!! So ironic! Haha -.-

Tired. Life goes on.

For some reasons seems that grim reaper's been doing his rounds and working OT too. Goodness...

Win some lose tons

It is a day of mixed results and emotions.

A total embarrassment for me and my other colleagues it was, when the students are not ready for presentation to a panel of judges for some competition. By peer pressure I took it up, the students were frank to the judges, they weren't interested in it and were forced to take it up... They didn't have the initiative and were just going through the motions. I wasn't present at the judging, and now I don't feel to good to leave others to pick up the shit for me like that. Yes in the first place it was sort of dumped on me, I could say no at the beginning. Shit that I didn't. Now it reflects the truth that looks ugly.


There was a date clash with the presentation and I chose to be elsewhere. I did try to get the date of judging changed but to no avail. The dragonboat date was fixed much earlier, so I was at the Dragonboat Regatta, the gals won first and the boys fourth for plates category respectively. They were happy to have some medals and plate (yes, literally) to show. Of course they will not let the rest know that there is the cup and plate category. Plate's the loser pool. But hey, they ain't dragonboaters to begin with, they are sailors with no regular rowing training. For some, it's their first time on a dragonboat.

I am just mentally weak, I admit. No can do attitude to inspire the laidback students to love their projects. No energy and creativity to match up, no commitment to rewrite the whole thesis for them, no skill to guide them through.

Even for dragonboat, let me do up the admin paperwork and some scolding etc when necessary... It is just so hard for me to inspire people. But for sports it is somehow easier than research to get the kiddos excited ... and I have another colleague to fall back on for that. (And this opens another can of worms as another colleague felt that she should have been there to guide me, then again she is already piled with other more important crap to do and handle, her plate is full. ) We simply just bite off so much more that we cannot chew.

Urgh. Angry and disappointed with self. I can't and don't want to fit in. I want to leave this bloody system that expects me to be a superhuman or that I am considered a failure.

Go away. Leave me alone.

Don't ask me what else I can do, the system ain't going to change for me and since I have been warned that the pace will become quicker and more numerical and further away from the true meaning of education, and the next change that will happen if I continue to stay will be my place of residence to the IMH... or be a super inefficent and temperamental, unbalanced person.


No, don't want to be that. Counting down...

Duh!!

I can't believe the mentality some Singaporeans have. Some actually complained that it is unreasonable to be forced to pay 10 cents for a plastic bag, an attempt to get people to get reusable bags and cut down on waste. We have taken so much for granted! Is the environment really that worthless, that even a mere 10 cents inconvenience is one inconvenience too much??

Yes, we dig our graves, with such mentality, let the human world end, it will be better for the rest of the organisms and Earth. (But before that, let me see my molas and mantas first.) ^^

Girls' (and one hubby) night in.

Wah, stylo siah... Machiam condo advertising poster...

Sometimes a simple gathering with close friends is all we need. :]

This is a must have, even if I bo kaki... ^_^

Lobangs never look so good.

Under watchful eyes...

Why are the blocks moving? (Damn the sake!)

It's still standing! Bleah!!

Tag team.

Sunrise. It is almost like we are overseas.

Basking in the morning sun, like what we will still do 40 years later. ^_^

Back in the apartment, mf awaits breakfast and hangover cure... only to find...

No.............................

Discussing breakfast plans and stoning...

Still stoning, and deciding... that is why having late nights n alcohol is not good. Heeheehee... well take my advice, I don't need it. >:P

It's there, will be there, still be there.

A picture says a thousand words and it varies with intepretation. Visuals have really a large impact as this pic it finally drives home a fact that I knew have existed, I just didn't realise the magnitude of it.

Haahaahaa omg, no wonder lah! All the mistakes etc. Am still in square one though... mule stubborness still hold. Lalalala... ^_^

With stubborness I seal my own fate, eons ago.

Round round round going round again.

小瓜的小感想

同事把一张纸搁在我桌上，令我思考；
象我这样吊儿郎当的究竟何德何能。。。
纸上写着小瓜的一段感想。
平时冷眼惯的我刹时不知如何应变。
小瓜的小举动，是幼稚的， 也是天真的。
小瓜的表达方式是简单的，也是真诚的。

我该感动，还是不把它当一回事？
呵呵，太过分析感情也是不好的喔！
意志弱时，有这样的小添油站也并非是件坏事。

Wet Dreams.

不要想歪喔！




Feeling abit out of sync today with all the accumulated minor irritations of business as usual and of distant memories of happier times past. Shall upload some pics copied from friends to relive the memories, and either perk up or sink into deeper depression. ^_^ (Anyway the alignment is killing me, so am not going to bother with it, some caps are up some are down.)

Drifting around...

Heads above the water...

Where the %$# is the boat?

Up there up there...

My first ray!! A battalion of urchins. Ouch!!

The must have groupie; crazy bunch!

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And then, back on the surface...

Act cool and (failing miserably)...

Still noob. Haiz...

Disposal of the BD girl, easier.

Washing up after a job well done. Oi...

Heehee... back to reality... sigh...

Ahhh...

"Oh shucks... super efficient siah, and send email liao to all???" -..-

Hehe... Oh well... Paiseh, but it happened, goner.

Haahaahaahaaa... Move on.

Tokens

Rambling mode again.

I really really don't like the idea of tokens of appreciation. But I am still using it, it is just oh so so convenient and esay to show appreciation in the simplest form of words and informing in a card or something and not really do something concrete to prove the point, to be really there for someone when it is most crucial.

Me. Hypocritical. Hah, it's yet another reason for me to hate myself. -.-







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To these I think my grouses are just tokens to their wisdoms and, probably cursed long lifes. Tis a random post from some poems that inspired some time back.



Men drop to the earth like leaves

Lives as brief as footprints in snow.

Bristlecones enthroned on top of the world

Watch civilizations come and go.

They seek our secret, immortality,

But search in vain, for it is vanity.

If truth be known I would rather be a flower,

or a leaf that lives and breathes with brief intensity.

My life is as thin as the wind

And I am done with counting stars.

On the side of this mountain I might live forever,

Could you imagine anything worse?

My name is Methuselah and this is my curse.



http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/methuselah/poems.html

SYF harvest.

It's a good start for the school during the SYF competition, the CIO obtained the Gold award in SYF. This is the first time our school had gotten Gold. The students went wild. It was a breakthrough for them, all the hardwork paid off.

Around 8 out of 20 schools attained the Gold Award, the standards of performing arts in schools have indeed risen throughout.











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Dots...







The cynical bastard in me is rearing its head up again...